the beat goes on

my brain is full up. my purse is empty.

these are the projects i need money for:

1. ballet company for fatties

2. play that i'm writing about bacteriologists

3. cabaret

and

4. that's all. there isn't a fourth.

this is the amount of money i have for the projects i want to do:

1. $0

the math is bad.

on another note, i was writing the bacteriologist play this week, and i showed a scene to my sister, and she was all, 'wo. that's way too close to home, kid. you gotta switch up some names and adjectives or our mother is going to disown you.'

woops.

so, then i dove into a massive inner thing of, 'why am i just stealing from the stories of my loved ones? is that okay? to just steal stuff and change names? doesn't seem okay.'

i still feel weird about it, but know that my writing's better when it's ripped from the headlines.

i've got to finish the grant applications this week. bottom line. 'cause now i'm actually starting to get excited about the art that i am making, and it would blow to not get it made due to funds.

i need to be wily. like the coyote, but less with the anvils, more with the thinking on how to do things creatively and without easy access to buckets of money.

k, off to plot a way to make water from wine. if anyone out there has clues, lemme know.

peace out.